Life is NOT fair!

 In Better Life, Focusing on the positive

Life is definitely NOT Fair!  But what if life is not suppose to be fair? Or perfect? Or easy? What if instead, life is suppose to be a place to learn and grow? I know! I know!  WHY does learning and growing have be painful?  Yet we all know, pain is a great teacher and we tend to remember the lesson if the pain is memorable.

This idea was a real shift in perspective for me and it’s not something I can always remember, but what a difference it has made!  The biggest change I’ve seen is when something doesn’t go the way I want, I recover much faster.  For example, I recently made a trip to Canada for a talk. Much to my surprise, I was delayed in customs.  It turns out there had been recent changes in legislation that required extra paperwork and fees on my part and for the company that hired me.  This meant several communications back and forth with the company (and my cell phone didn’t work in Canada) and a few extra taxi trips back and forth from customs.  Luckily my talk wasn’t until 1 pm so I had the morning to get things settled.  I quickly reminded myself that life is not suppose to be fair, and this was a great opportunity to practice creating my own experience in this set of circumstances.  I could only do what I could do.  So I joked around with the custom’s officer and “people watched” in the airport.  I didn’t stress.  In the end, all went well, and I was able to make it to my talk on time feeling calm.  Phew!

I recently saw this quote by Jackson Kiddard that fits this theme so well –

“Anything that annoys you is for teaching you patience.
Anyone who abandons you is for teaching you how to stand up on your own two feet.
Anything that angers you is for teaching you forgiveness and compassion.
Anything that has power over you is for teaching you how to take your power back.
Anything you hate is for teaching you unconditional love.
Anything you fear is for teaching you courage to overcome your fear.
Anything you can’t control is for teaching you how to let go and trust the Universe.” 

Think back on your life.  What experiences have taught you patience, self-confidence, forgiveness or courage?


Tina Hallis, Ph.D. is a professional speaker and consultant for The Positive Edge.  She uses science to help people shift the way they think so they can achieve more success in their work and in their lives.  

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