What Causes Us the Most Negativity? And How Can We Build Our Immunity?
What causes us the most negativity? Based on anonymous surveys and feedback from clients, the answers I get almost always point to one major contributor – Other People! I hear about frustrating coworkers, unhappy customers, pessimistic family members, and difficult bosses. Even people that we enjoy being with can be negative at times. For example when they vent to us about their frustrating coworkers, customers, etc.
A common question I get is, “How can I change this other person? How can I make them more positive? Working (living, interacting) with them is bringing me down.”
I get it! My mood, energy, and attitude are easily impacted by other people. But I didn’t have a good answer. However, this question inspired me to find an answer. I reached out to 15 experts, interviewing them about their experience and knowledge in this area. What I learned has changed my life and I’m hoping it will change the lives of many others, including you.
As I analyzed and summarized all that I had learned from life coaches, psychologists, counselors, and best selling authors from around the country, I noticed themes that emerged that fell into a pattern that I now call the 5-step Immunity to Negativity Formula.™
As you know, changing other people is hard, especially if they don’t want to change. Instead, a much more effective and faster way to improve the situation is to change ourselves. Yikes! This didn’t sound like the answer I was hoping for! But as I experimented with some of the ideas I had learned, I realized it was true. If I want to change how I feel when I’m around other people’s negativity, I have to start with me; I have to build my immunity.
The Immunity to Negativity Formula™
I will be sharing tools from each step of the Immunity to Negativity Formula™ in future positivity tips. Step 1. is Prepare. This step is divided into two parts; charging our positivity battery and shifting our perspective.
Let’s start with part 1. It’s much easier to remain calm when our positivity battery is charged. Imagine interacting with someone who’s being negative when you’re stressed, upset, or feeling drained. Now think of how much easier it would be if you were upbeat, optimistic, and feeling good. This provides us more resources, resilience, and willpower in those difficult interactions.
How can you make sure your positivity battery is charged so you can be more immune to other people’s negativity? Here are a few ideas from the experts I interviewed.
- Count your blessings.
- Take several deep breaths to calm down.
- Be nice to yourself physically and emotionally. Remember, it’s self-care, not selfishness.
- Go for a walk. Get fresh air and get your blood moving.
